Finding someone to look up to and pattern you life after is getting tougher in this day and age. Our sports stars have more horse hormones than Mr. Ed, our media makes icons of people that do nothing - literally nothing - but get engaged to men with the same name as them. (BTW, how confusing will the vows be at the wedding... "Paris, do you.....". "Who you talking to? Me or him?")
I hate seeing my loyal readers left on an island with not a soul to look up to. As always, your Uncle Hof is here to save the day. I give you.... "Uncle Hof's Superhero of the Week"
This comes from The Smoking Gun and is reprinted without permission (so keep yer yap shut)
Jimmy Buffett Phone Fiasco (link)
Bill Clinton gets crank-called by finder of singer's lost cell
JUNE 8--A Florida busboy who found singer Jimmy Buffett's cell phone--and then proceeded to keep it for a week--told cops that his buddies may have crank-called former President Bill Clinton, whose number was stored in the phone's directory. According to the below Lake Worth Police Department report, Jason Martin, 22, found Buffett's phone outside a Cuban jazz club where the singer partied in late May.
According to an amusing story in today's Palm Beach Post, Martin and his cronies scrolled through the phone's address book (while they were "smoking weed") and marveled at the high caliber of Buffett's address book, which included ex-presidents Clinton and Jimmy Carter, Al Gore, Bill Gates, Harrison Ford, George Clooney, and musicians from rapper Cam'ron to country singer Alan Jackson.
After rejecting Buffett entreaties (and a $200 reward) for the phone's return, Martin finally surrendered the item after cops and Secret Service agents showed up at his home Saturday. As a reward for his telephone intransigence, Martin, who is pictured at right in a mug shot from a 2002 arrest, was fired from his job at the Cuban joint.
You sir, are the fucking MAN.... but I wonder if Stoner and his Stone-ettes really took full advantage of their opportunity. If I had that phone... O lordy:
"Hey, Bill, it's me, Jimmy. What was that Monica chick's number again... I can't find the gosh-dern thing."
"Hey, Jimmy C, it's me, Jimmy B. Is it a sin if I have lust in my heart for your wife..."
"Hey, Al, it's me, Jimmy B. Any chance you can swing by the cabana this week and show me those dance moves again? I got Fleetwood Mac in my ipod but can't remember all the steps."
"Hey, Bill, it's me, Jimmy. My fucking XP crashed again, gotta second?"